Monday, April 26, 2010

Politics or International Humour!?

UN conducted a survey.


The question was:"Would you please give your honest opinion abt d shortage of food in d rest of d world?"


The survey was a failure as..

In Africa d people did not know what 'food' was.

In China they did not know what 'opinion' was.

Europeans did not know what 'shortage' was.

Pak and India did not know what 'honest' meant.

Saudi arabia did not know what 'please' was.

And Americans did not know what 'rest of the world' meant!

Friday, April 23, 2010

A bit of banter | Vikram Hazra's blog

Guys, I was browsing through Vikram bhaiyas blog and found an extremely intelligent and hilarious war of words - German v/s English.
Its too good. Just couldn't resist sharing

http://www.vikramhazra.com/2010/03/bit-of-banter.html


See above link or read below:


The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. 



As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". 



In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

  


There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. 




In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. 




Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. 




Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. 




By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". 




During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl. 




Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. 



Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.


Cheers


Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone

Mesmerised by Rishi Vidhyadharji



The last five days I have been meeting him daily.

His presence exudes peace and awareness.
His words bring solace, intrigues the seeker and kindle wisdom.

I am in awe of his wisdom,
I am inspired by his dedication,
In his presence, my heart wells up in gratitude and my soul feels elevated.

A few excerpts from his Gyan Vani:

Being with nothing is Meditation,
Doing for nothing is Seva,
Singing for nothing is Satsang.

Meditation gives Peace,
Satsang gives Joy,
Seva gives Love,
Knowledge gives Contentment.

Rather than 'Think before you Talk'; 'Observe your sielnce before you talk'. Only if you are silent within, then the words that you speak will either give solace or direction or both, to the listener. Words that bring neither solace nor give direction to the listener are best not spoken.
Six reasons to use words:
1. To inquire about life
2. To bless
3. To praise
4. To delegate work
5. To give knowledge
6. To tell Guru stories

More may follow, or the best thing is meet him.

Aho Niranjano!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Break up hua to Life Jhingalala !

When ur girl friend / boy friend ditches you resulting in a break off...:

1. Thank god/guru it happened now instead of much later which would have put you in a deeper bigger mess.

2. Know that emotions are like fishes in the ocean called YOU. Fishes play in the ocean and with the ocean and even fight amongst themselves. Fishes will perish but the ocean remains. Who is bigger? The fish or the ocean. So don't become a slave of your emotions, YOU are a temporary abode for them, sooner or later they will leave you. YOU still remain. YOU are infinte. YOU are eternal.

3. Some karmas of the past births or this had brought the two of you together. If the karma quota is over then your struggle to unite again could turn out to be an endless one. Just let go. And who knows there may be someone better in store, but your holding onto the past is postponing the new arrival.

4. Isn't it a relief to be off the close circuit surveillance?

5. Once married you will never get a chance to be single again. But now you can enjoy the liberties of being single again.

6. Finally now there is a ray of hope for focusing on acads and career and hobbies and family and real friends (of the same sex as urs) and and ... And this and that and...I mean there is so much more life in ur life suddenly!

7. So much more scope for infatuations, crushes, love at first sight, poetry, shayari, dates, adventures of proposing...its like you have been gifted a renewed teenage with more experience and practical wisdom.

So isn't a break up a BLESSING?!

Cheers
"Ever new, happy you." - Sri Sri
Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone